Cemetery Designer

When I got a job, at first such dialogues were pleasing to me:
- Have you got a job? - Yes!
“And where do you work?” - At the cemetery!
- OH MY GOD!

I was involved in the memorial plaque of Valery Lobanovsky, which was hanged at the entrance to the main building of ONPU .
During the printing process, I almost ruined the top badge, and Lobanovsky’s suit. But he found out who he was. But I don’t understand why the Polytech needs this tablet, but I don’t really care.

However, I want to say that I don’t feel the “terrible negative energy” in the cemetery. On the contrary, the first salary, for example, caused a wild delight! In the future, I began to rumble that this money was not enough for me, but now is not about that.

Yes, and I work with a free schedule, in the winter I come for a salary that is paid to me stably, no matter what, so overall a good place.

But the work is dusty (granite dust everywhere), noisy (portraits, letters are knocked out in the workshop, my machine buzzes), and it’s hard to get there, yes.

“What does the designer do in the cemetery?” - you ask.
“The same as almost all designers do.” - I will answer - "I make pictures."

TREEDE FACILITIES



For example, I make sketches of monuments for clients. I rarely see clients themselves, all through the boss. He draws to me what is needed on the leaves, says what stone is made of, what little ringlets, what shape and how.

I do this all in a bunch of Rhino + Maxwell Render, print, bring a leaf to my boss, he expresses his satisfaction or displeasure, after which I either go home, or go to remake, or engrave. And my main task is to draw pictures for their further engraving with a machine on granite slabs. So ...

Engraving



On my shoulders there are pictures of something that is somehow connected with the dead. For example, a fisherman died - draw a river bank with a bridge and reeds. Sailor - draw a ship. The man had a Lada - draw a Lada. Airplane pilot. Land to the peasants, factories to the workers.
I do not do portraits (I did just a couple of pieces including Lobanovsky), delicate work, people are very demanding on portraits. The machine cannot provide such quality, and if it is also glucan ...

How is the image obtained?

Polished granite stone is black. Without polishing - gray, rough.
Using a diamond needle, the machine creates small depressions on a polished monument (knocks down polishing). The light in them is reflected differently than from a polished surface, due to which we see the silhouettes.



Stanochka goes line by line the image is from top to bottom, it is called “Panel-Count Leader 600”, it was built back in 2006 (and there are no guarantees for 4 years, but it still works), in those days I’m even a couple I didn’t skip, and even more so had no idea what kind of work awaited me.
The machine is connected via LPT port to the computer. The machine is controlled directly from the computer, the machine, in turn, does not even have its own memory. When the demanding application is turned on (for example, Unreal Tournament 3 or rendering in Maxwell Render), the machine starts to twitch, “stupid”, which affects the quality of the picture. Do not rape the computer while engraving.

What to do in Photoshop?



When preparing the image, it is worth remembering that the color rendition of the image on granite slabs is still rather weak, shades of gray turn out badly. Therefore, it is important to draw all the contours, the details should be full of contrast (from black to white) on the screen, otherwise the plate will get a solid gray daub. Soft transitions often look stained. Better to avoid pictures with a depth of field.

The finished result must be saved in bmp, grayscale, 8 bit format.
The machine control program does not perceive anything else.
Resolution: 85 ppi Max image size 58x36 cm.

Difficulties
I will not describe in detail everything that a designer may encounter when working with an engraving machine. I can only say that the image should be where it is necessary, not to miss, do not print upside down (it was the case), all the details must be well-defined, the needle is not pressed tightly or loosened (it can scratch or not finish in places), the machine should be tight fixed (also there was a case). And it’s better not to kill than to interrupt, let the brightness be a little less, you can engrave manually.
And still no one is immune from some kind of sudden glitch, everything happens.
And if you slipped a shitty cord - then from bad contact there can be many more interesting things.

Soul aspect
People die on earth, as is the case in nature. There is nothing terrible or surprising in this. But there are really sad cases that you usually don’t think about. Children are dying, parents are asked to draw a sleeping angel on the stove.

Now you won’t be surprised.