How to protect yourself from hypnovirus

    According to the human rights organization Kämpa för munkar, hypnovirus activity has doubled in the past month.

    On a map made from an American satellite, infected areas are visible.

    Statistics say that more than half of the files walking on the network are infected with one kind or another of this rubbish, including:

    • files on torrents - 5%,
    • porn
    movies - 21%, • films produced by Marvel Studios - 60%,
    • films with the participation of Nicolas Cage - 95%,
    • Dan Brown's books - 100%.

    However, it is too early to panic: hypnoviruses can and should be fought, because they have their own Achilles heel. For immersion in a hypnotic trance, it is necessary that the victim’s head be from the monitor at a distance of no more than a meter, otherwise the effect is not achieved. A distance of one and a half meters is guaranteed to be safe.

    Thus, those who view files on television screens are protected from the effects of hypnovirus; for the rest, protective gadgets and preventive techniques have been developed.

    The most radical way of preventive protection is offered by the surgical clinic of Dr. Wankenstein. Lengthening your hands to a safe one and a half meters will cost you about 2 thousand dollars with insurance.

    With such long hands, you can fearlessly work with any mobile device.

    Tritronix has developed an office catapult chair. Sensors mounted on the user's neck track movements. At the moment when the movements become too monotonous, it is recorded that the user has entered into a hypnotic trance. At the same instant, the chair shoots back from the monitor at a distance sufficient to stop the harmful effects.

    On eBay, a programmer’s bailout seat costs about $ 1,700. It is recommended to buy along with several mattresses, because the shooting is quite powerful.

    The Japanese company "Soloy" professes the opposite approach. The Japanese do not separate the user from the monitor, but vice versa. A concrete slab is installed on the ceiling above the monitor, which falls when the sensor is triggered, reliably blocking access to the infected file.

    Soloy installers will install a falling concrete slab on your computer for just $ 1,350.

    But the easiest and cheapest way to protect against hypnoviruses is a glove with extended fingers. Such gloves, of various sizes and colors, are sold in online hypermarkets and cost from 1 to 30 dollars, depending on the model and manufacturer.

    Using a glove for remote work, you can easily sit away from the monitor or laptop and do not become a victim of an attacker.

    If the previous methods of protection did not suit you or you could not afford it, use an antivirus.

    Habr users, be careful!

    The duration of exposure in case of infection is from 3 to 5 minutes. This is enough to end up in a hypnotic trance to nullify your bank accounts, inform your superiors everything you think about him, or post them on the cat’s social network. Transactions are performed from your computer, so it’s problematic to prove anything in court.

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