How to better understand people

    Telling IT people about psychology is another matter, some readers will say: “Bullshit!”, And they won’t believe at all, because psychology, even applied, cannot be called an exact science. However, the purpose of this article is to show and prove to you that some models really work. It is based on a report by Sergey Kotyrev from UMI at RIT ++ 2017, and the narrative will go further on his behalf.



    I am an IT entrepreneur with 20 years of experience. It so happened that from the very beginning of my career I had to manage people. As a graduate of a technical university and an IT specialist, I initially understood that people are difficult to algorithmize, and generally to understand, understand and predict.

    Later I came to the conclusion that people are generally the most difficult, с чем приходится работать. Сейчас я думаю, что люди вообще, наверное, самое сложное, что есть во Вселенной.

    Мне кажется, о поведении и предсказании поведения спиральных галактик мы знаем больше, чем о том, как поведет себя человек, например, моя жена, сотрудник, или особенно сотрудница моего отдела маркетинга, не говоря уже о пиарщицах. О том, что ближайшая к нам Галактика летит, и через сколько-то миллиардов лет столкнется с нашей, мы уже знаем точно.


    Почему психология не является точной наукой?


    Imagine a three-dimensional object, in this case a cylinder. And any psychologist thinks in a certain two-dimensional space, within the framework of his model. Imagine that this three-dimensional object is a person, his psyche. One psychologist, within the framework of his model, will say that he sees a circle in this person, and the other - a square. They will argue to hoarseness because they use different psychological approaches.

    Let's imagine that the human psyche is actually not a 3-D, but an N-dimensional object. It is so multifaceted that we can imagine a bunch of projections, each of which will be unlike other figures. The more projections we collect, the more ideas we get about the real form of the original object. All existing psychological schools and theories are nothing but separate projections.

    Сегодня я расскажу о тех, которые мне помогли в работе и жизни.

    Для начала хочу сказать, что изначально к психологии, как любой айтишник, я относился очень подозрительно, даже с неким пренебрежением, пока не столкнулся с несколькими теориями, которые на удивление действительно работали и продолжают работать.

    Что у меня прижилось и хорошо работает


    Из всего многообразия теорий и школ, так сказать, отражений реальности, я выделил 5, которые работают у меня:

    • 5 языков любви Чепмена;
    • MBTI и NLP по Гринфельду;
    • Process Communication (PCM);
    • Теория Герта Хофстеде;
    • Психософия Афанасьева

    Думаю, что эти теории будут полезны тем, кому по долгу службы приходится управлять людьми: уникальными, разнообразными, сложными, иногда не предсказуемыми, порой, на наш взгляд, непонятливыми и даже туповатыми.

    “5 languages ​​of love” by Gary Chapman


    The easiest book to read in a couple of hours.

    American family psychologist Gary Chapman initially raised this topic to analyze the causes of divorce. In his opinion, we express our love in  5 different languages . And this is not about sexual love, more precisely, not only about it, but about love in general: to people, including employees, ideas, companies, values, etc.

    You probably realize that employees should feel that you love them. This is a pretty effective thing for management. According to Chapman’s theory, each of us has 5 languages ​​of love, one of which is developed, and on the rest we do not perceive love and are not able to show it.

    Service


    - Honey, do you want me to bring you coffee?

    To offer coffee is the most primitive example of service. The most difficult thing is to serve your family, your company, your team - do not sleep at night, think about them, look for where to get money for your salary, etc.

    By the way, this is my language of love. I understand love only when they serve me, and I show love myself, only by serving - not only to other people, but to ideas, mission, values, team, company, etc.

    Touch


    Many people enjoy the physical touch. This is for them the main language of love: kisses, hugs, a simple pat on the shoulder.

    I hate it when they touch me. And my wife, on the contrary, loves touch. Therefore, she tells me that I do not like her because I am stroking a little - it is not close to me. But I understand that she needs it, because in this language she understands that I like her. No, with us everything is fine, but stroking just like that I do not see any point.

    Gifts


    There are people who show their love only through gifts, and understand that they love him only when they give him something. And they themselves love to give.

    Quality time


    This is the time when you devote your attention to a person, and not just, for example, sitting on the couch together and watching TV.

    I will give an example. One of our programmers turned sour and wanted to quit. We went with him to a cafe and talked about nothing for 3 hours - and everything. After that, he flourished, stayed to work on, and worked well. This is not my language of love, I do it a little bit through the effort on myself. After reading this book, I realized what the employee’s language of love was and showed him that he was dear to me (and the company), although he was not my direct subordinate at all.

    Words of approval / support


    For me, this is a completely alien language. I hardly force myself to support and praise someone - you are a professional, and you will deal with your problems yourself. I myself also do not need any words of support and approval - I myself will deal with my problems. But there are people for whom this is very important.

    After reading this book, my friend Dmitry Agarunov, in his Gameland publishing house, wrote his love language on the staff badges. Just come up and immediately see: - Yeah, service ... Maybe bring a coffee?

    Greenfeld MBTI


    This is a school based on MBTI and  NLP ( www.grinfeld.ru ), and Mikhail Solomonovich Greenfeld is one of my teachers. He does not write books, but conducts trainings on VIP-negotiations - very expensive and long, but this is pure magic and shamanism. For example, after his training, I earned an extra million dollars on one transaction by simply applying the methodology proposed by him. This training paid off a thousandfold. Greenfeld is based on MBTI (Myers-Briggs classic typology). I do not really like this technique, but he interpreted it in a very interesting way.

    I will tell her essence in a nutshell. For example, I am going to negotiate with a top manager. It can be abstract, or it can be concrete, and my style of communication with this person and the success of negotiations ultimately depend on this.

    What is the difference between an abstract-minded and  specifically-minded person?

    • An abstractly thinking person sees space up to the horizon and even beyond the horizon. He sees prospects for the next 5-10 years, but  hates the details and details.
    • Specifically, the thinker sees the trees, not the forest. Prospects are not available to him, but he  loves to delve into the details , in the nuances, etc.

    Such a specific seller comes to the abstract buyer and begins to load it with details. He turns sour after 5 minutes and says: “Go to my deputy!” (Usually abstract leaders have specific deputies).

    Or vice versa, an abstract seller comes to a specific customer and begins to tell him about spaceships plowing the expanses of the Bolshoi Theater. And he says: “No, you specifically tell - what, how much, when, how much, etc.”

    This is only one of the dimensions that Greenfeld has a lot, as well as cases. It helps me a lot - to sell, to hire, and to manage. Although I repeat that I am not a fan of MBTI. But we must admit that MBTI among all theories of applied psychology is now the most popular in the world. Therefore, I recommend to study it anyway. But I recommend studying with Greenfeld even more. Tell him my last name, he will give you a discount. It matters because training is expensive. I don’t have anything from this, I’m just very grateful to him for the knowledge, skills and insights.

    Hofstede Theory


    Герт Хофстеде — голландский ученый, который занимался вопросами межкультурных различий (cross-cultural difference). Например, почему японский менеджмент так сильно отличается от американского, а русский от немецкого. Хотя эта теория изначально касалась международного менеджмента, она очень хорошо применима в анализе личностных свойств человека

    Hofstede was commissioned by multinationals. As a result, a very coherent system based on real research was built, for which Forbes recognized Hofstede as one of the most respected business scientists in the field of psychology. I have no way to talk about this theory in detail now. For myself, I made one important discovery. This theory works equally well in management, both at the level of nations and national characteristics, and at the level of specific personalities within the company.

    The Hofstede theory is based on an assessment of 5 parameters:

    1. The Power Distance Index (PDI) shows how much a person (or society as a whole) is inclined to recognize inequality.

    For example, in Russia this indicator is traditionally high, while in Holland, Sweden and Israel it is low.

    The same goes for the atmosphere in any company. Depending on the PDI level, the role of management is completely different:

    • With a low PDI, a top manager is a gaming coach along with everyone;
    • In companies with high PDI, this is the king.

    It is interesting! If, in general, Power Distance is high in Russian companies, then it is low in IT companies. We are generally special. That is why Russian IT specialists so easily leave for developed countries with low PDI.

    2. Individualism (IDV)  - individualism / collectivism.

    For example, Americans are individualists, and Chinese are collectivists.

    3. Masculinity (MAS)  - masculinity / femininity.

    The Americans with their cult Rambo, “Where is your money?”, “You are a loser!” And everyone else have a very high MAS index. Thailand, by contrast, is one of the most “feminine” cultures in the world. Russia is also a "female country" - remember our tales, folk songs, etc.

    Sometimes it’s enough to see how men and women look in the country, and it becomes clear who shapes the national character. Remember the typical German or English women, and to compare Russian, Ukrainian or Thai girls.

    4. Uncertainty Avoidance Index (UAI) - acceptance / non-acceptance of uncertainty.

    5. Long-Term Orientation (LTO)  - long-term / short-term.

    LowTall
    PDIInspire and adviseFormulate tasks and control their implementation
    IDVRelationship assessment, loyalty. Subtle psychology of motivation and rewardsEvaluate results, straightforward praise or criticism
    MasIntuition, flexibility in decision making, compromise, equality, peaceful atmosphereStimulating the fight, impartiality, clear rules, hierarchy, competitive atmosphere
    UAIFew rules, free schedule, wide powers, flexibility and improvisation, toleranceClear rules, instructions, formalism, rituals, structuredness
    LTOQuick resultsLong-term stable effect in the future.

    What is good for the Russian is for the German ...


    Hofstede has scientific evidence of the famous proverb " What is good for the Russian, the German is death ."



    Compare Russian with German:

    • Our PDI is one of the highest in the world, so we always need a king who decides everything, is responsible for everything. In Germany, he is low, so they have Merkel.
    • We are a more collectivist country than individualistic, unlike the Germans.
    • We are more feminine than Germans.
    • We accept uncertainty much easier . This is understandable - the Germans plan and clearly structure everything, but we have such a story that it is impossible for us. You planned something, and tomorrow the Tatar-Mongols will come - plan, do not plan, what a difference!
    • The long-term index in Russia is lower for the same reason.

    ... and the Chinese




    • Power Distance in China is also high - the Communist Party, led by the chairman, rules there.
    • The Chinese are even bigger collectivists than we are.
    • The Chinese are more courageous than feminine.
    • The Chinese acceptance of uncertainty is lower, but also quite high.
    • The Chinese, roughly speaking, have a development plan for the next 100 years or more. Our task, including in management, is to get the maximum today, and tomorrow, even though the grass does not grow because the horseradish knows what will happen tomorrow. This is the key difference between us and the Chinese.

    Process Communication Model


    This is the latest theory for me, which I still study. She seemed very interesting to me, so I’ll say a few words about her. This model was developed by the American psychologist Tybee Kahler in the 1970s. In 1978, he signed a contract with NASA, according to which he took part in the selection of psychological compatibility among astronauts to equip effective crews. The selection was carried out, including by psychotype, and not just by physical and professional parameters. This work was successfully completed.

    Now Kahler’s development is popular mainly in America and France, and in Russia almost no one knows about it. We brought in a trainer who provided training for the EO Entrepreneurship Organization I am a member of. The model is called Process Communication(communication process) because it allows you to understand at what level a person is most effective in communicating with other people.

    Basically allocated 6 levels . They are theoretically equal to each other, but for each person they are not equal. The lower the level, the more energy a person spends, communicating at this level and trying to move to his basic - more understandable and simple for him.



    For example, my PCM model:

    • The basic level is logic, I have 100% energy there. It’s easy and simple for me to speak the language of logic.
    • The next level is stubborn. Speaking at the level of life principles and ideas is also not difficult for me.
    • Dreamer;
    • Figure;
    • Rebel;
    • Sincere.

    At each next level, it is becoming increasingly difficult for me to communicate with other people . For example, on a spiritual level, I have only 5-10% of my nominal energy power. I lose a lot of energy there, and the efficiency is the lowest because I'm not at all spiritual.

    I am a logician , I think logically, I am responsible, I try to explain everything from the point of view of logic. And a  sincere person is warm, sensitive, sensitive, empathic, etc. Not mine.

    Persistent  is a person with his life principles, who will not go to their violation. He has his own rules of the game, which he invented for himself, or his parents inspired him, or someone else, and he lives by them.

    Activist - This is a typical entrepreneur - a creator who is constantly doing something, negotiates, spinning, spinning.

    The dreamer loves being alone, sitting, thinking and dreaming of something. He will not do anything until they kick him. But the dreamer is good in that he can give rise to the most creative ideas that even logicians do not come to mind. Dreamers have wild imagination and imagination.

    For example, when I had an advertising agency, a girl worked in it. She was a typical dreamer, that is, until you kick, she will not fly. She hung at work, listening to music and looking at one point. My job was to force her creative concepts to be written for large clients. When she wrote these texts, everyone's jaw dropped - they were so cool. But it was necessary that nobody touch her for some time, and periodically kicked so that she would not hang.

    Soulful person is found in many companies. Usually these are women, but I know several male businessmen of this level. By the way, in IT companies there are not enough sincere people.

    The most important thing for a rebel is to draw attention to himself, to amaze everyone, shock, surprise, draw in the rays of glory, say something like that so that everyone looks at him.



    Process Communication is a fairly expensive but effective 2-day training. After you study the Psychosophy of Afanasyev, I recommend that you do it. They complement each other very well, because they look at a person in different projections, but do not contradict.

    Psychosophy of Afanasyev


    This is my favorite theory , which began my fascination with applied psychology. Probably, if she had not appeared in my life, I would have scored psychology because I thought that all this bullshit for girls was crazy, and such a serious peasant as I shouldn’t be engaged in this.

    But I read the book, and was amazed - it works! I learned many things not only about other people, but also about myself. For instance:

    • Why do I have a constant conflict with my mother?
    • Or why did I have a misunderstanding with my father?
    • Or why did my parents divorce?
    • Or why did I divorce my first wife?
    • Or why did I love my second wife so much, and why did she love me?
    • Or why does my son sometimes behave rather strangely from my point of view?
    • And much, much more, about my employees, partners and clients, including.

    Since childhood, I had the feeling that I was somehow not the same as everyone, and therefore I was uncomfortable with many people. In addition, I am also an introvert. He studied - and finally understood himself. I realized that I was actually quite normal, I was just not in the right environment for my psychotype.

    Alexander Yuryevich Afanasyev was born in 1950, died in 2005. Initially, he studied socionics , and then said as Lenin: “No, we will go the other way!” And went to the libraries, studying several years of the biography of famous people, highlighting their psychotype according to the new a model similar and at the same time unlike socionics.

    After the advent of the theory of Afanasyev, which he called " Psychosophy", The followers of socionics split into two unequal camps: those who followed Afanasyev, and adherents of the old school. I also studied socionics, I do not like it. Psychosophy worked perfectly! I think that this theory is really cool. She says that each of us has different life values. That is, psychotyping a person is an understanding of his values.

    You will be very surprised, but your values ​​do not coincide with the values ​​of most people who surround you. Based on values, we come to understand how a person will think and what is important for him, how he will make decisions and how to act.

    4 personality functions


    To begin with, the human person consists of four basic terms called “functions”. This is not so hot, what a discovery, but nothing more to come up with:

    • ЭМОЦИЯ (душа) — все ценности, связанные с духовным миром. Это не только наши переживания и эмоции (от истерик до эйфории), но еще и все, что связано с правополушарной деятельностью — с искусством, креативом, чувственностью и т.д.
    • ЛОГИКА (ум) — это наш рациональный ум. Для правшей — это левое полушарие мозга, наша способность абстрактно мыслить.
    • ФИЗИКА (тело) — кроме тела, это все ценности, связанные с материальным миром: жизненная энергия, секс, деньги, вещи, побрякушки, крутые тачки, часы, брюлики и так далее.
    • WILL (spirit) is self-esteem, self-esteem, a place in the social hierarchy: who you are, the leader in the middle, or you are at the very bottom and obey everything. Ability to make decisions and take responsibility. It is also the ability and desire to influence other people, forcing them to do what you want.

    The trick is that every person has all four functions by nature, but they are in a different sequence.

    Function Order


    Each person has different functions, for example:

    Man AMan In
    1st Physics1st Emotion
    2nd Logic2nd Volia
    3rd Volia3rd Logic
    4th Emotion4th Physics

    Functions are not equivalent. There is an internal hierarchy of these functions, which determines the type of each person (24 psychotypes in total). Of course, many IT professionals with the 1st logic will say that this is all bullshit, you can’t divide all the diversity of people into 24 types. It's too easy.

    Actually, you can. I will not argue that 2 people with the same psychotype will be the same. No, they will not do! They won’t because they have different parents, different destinies, they grew up in different countries, they have different bodies. They will still be different. But! Their life values ​​will be approximately the same .

    2 upper functions are considered conditionally strong sides of the personality, and 2 lower functions are conditionally weak. But I emphasize here the word " conditionally"because sometimes the 4th function of one person is much stronger than the 1st function of another, as measured, for example, intelligence or physical abilities. Sometimes our conditionally weak sides influence our destiny much more strongly than conditionally strong ones. I’ll tell you a little more in detail, because it may be incomprehensible.

    First function


    This is the most important, strong and typical aspect of our nature, our most important weapon of survival:

    • support of personality, the foundation of the psyche.
    • always on display.
    • formulates a personal goal in life, the meaning of life, a system of values, we look at the world primarily through the prism of the 1st function.

    This is our main weapon in conflicts : family, workers - any. It always turns on first (first reaction). In any danger, if a person has the first function:

    • physics, then he either hits hard or runs away quickly;
    • logic, then he immediately comprehends the situation and finds a solution;
    • emotion, then he begins to gush and yell so that the enemies themselves scatter.

    In addition, we need weapons not only to fight enemies. For example, there is a weapon in our love tasks when you need to continue your kind. This is also a survival task, which is given to us by nature and which every 1st function solves in its own way:

    • 1st logic will try to hit the girl with his mind;
    • 1st physics will demonstrate to the girl his appearance - beauty, strength, pumped up muscles, material wealth;
    • 1st emotion will sing serenades and read poetry;
    • 1st will will simply take by the hand and say: “Come with me!”

    You will laugh, one of my comrades with the 1st will did so. He just saw a beautiful girl, took her hand and ordered - let's go! She went. Still married and happy.

    The first function is very powerful, but it has one problem. She is redundant and rude .

    • 1-Emotional person prone to tantrums for any reason.
    • 1-Logical person - a frank bore. He is not able to hear someone else's point of view if it does not coincide with his own.
    • 1-Physical person is greedy and aggressive. So among thieves and bandits there are many 1-physical people. He is also prone to gluttony and many other pleasant things that physics gives.
    • A 1-Free man rudely presses on everyone else, breaks them on the knee, demands that everything be according to his will and does not listen to anyone but himself.

    Afanasyev compared the first function with a sledgehammer . This is not a very thin tool, most suitable for punching walls. But this is not a clock screwdriver for mending subtle mechanisms.

    Second function


    The ideal function in our psychotype is the best and healthy part of human nature :

    • does not set goals in life, but is the main tool for achieving them.
    • It is not striking either to itself or to others.

    It is process , unlike the first function, can listen to others and communicate with them, and it is exactly the same as it should ideally be - it is not too much and not too little.

    For example, the best actor is a person not with the first emotion, but with the second, because when he needs to, he will cry, and when he needs to laugh, and 2 seconds can elapse between these events. The best logician is a person with a second logic, and not with the first one because the first one usually reasons like this: “I'm the smartest here. Therefore, either listen to what I am telling you, or you are to blame. ” And the second logic will say: “It's interesting to listen to your opinion, let's discuss it!”

    The second will is a person who is difficult to break, bend, but at the same time he himself does not put pressure on other people. The second physics is the most hardworking, energetic and viable people.

    Afanasyev compared the second function with the river, which, like the Volga, flows endlessly and for a long time, and you always know that water will not end in it. So is our 2nd function. It is like good health - we don’t notice it at all because we believe that it is inexhaustible until some kind of problem occurs.

    Third function


    As you know, we should be unlucky in something - all people have not only advantages, but also disadvantages . More precisely, we have what we consider to be our shortcomings, which we think from childhood that we were not very successful in this.

    We look at other people, and we see that they have it developed cool, but we do not. And we begin to envy them, or to fall in love with them, or to learn from them, etc.

    This is just the third function:

    • The root of our self-doubt;
    • The main reason for our inferiority complexes, insults, conflicts.
    • The source of love and hate, discomfort, a feeling of unfulfillment.

    If a person has 3rd logic, he is not sure that he is smart enough and competent.

    If a person has 3rd emotion, he is not sure that he is relaxed enough, open, not pinched, etc.

    If a person has the 3rd will, he is always afraid that he is not sufficiently respected and appreciated.

    If a person has a 3rd physicist, he is not sure of his beauty, masculinity, and also that he is sufficiently wealthy. He spread rot for himself all the time. The girl constantly doubts whether she is beautiful, whether her men want. Men also doubt about the opinions of girls about themselves.

    We are always afraid of hitting the 3rd function:

    • 3rd logic is afraid of being accused of stupidity,
    • 3rd physics - physical violence,
    • 3rd will - humiliation,
    • 3rd emotion - tantrums.

    It drains into very different things. The fact is that the third function is the same process as the second. The processuality of the third means that a person must constantly prove that he is okay with this. The first and fourth function are effective - proved to myself, and everything is fine.

    Since this is the most painful place in our country, we always try to cover it, as the players cover their most sensitive place during the wall. So we constantly go, covering with a fig leaf our third function.

    I have already said that the lower functions (3-4) are conditionally weak. In fact, only the fourth function is weak. The third is very strong because it is the driver and mover of our self-development.. For example, who most often goes to the gym or is engaged in extreme sports, torments himself in all sorts of biathlon, triathlon and other marathons? - 3-physical people! They care most about their health because it is important for them, and they are very unsure of it.

    Who are the most beautiful and sophisticated girls? - 3-physical! 2-physical is confident in her beauty, she knows that everything is fine with her. And the 3-physical will prove it all his life.

    Who reads and learns the most? - 3-logical!

    Who is the most sophisticated musician? - 3-emotional!

    Look at Tom York from Radiohead, for example. In general, all of British rock is the music of the 3rd emotion, and the 1st emotion is Freddie Mercury. Whose music is finer and more elegant? I can compare - I have the 1st emotion, so I believe that I am the best versed in art.

    For example, one of my friends with 3rd physics got stuck on consumption. It is important for him to buy the latest BMW model or the largest house. His 3rd physics is manifested in the fact that he is not sure that he will be respected if he lives more modestly. And he will not respect himself.

    By the way, who are the coolest managers? 3-freed. They are flexible, not self-confident, but they carefully hide it - therefore, they work on themselves a lot. They are also great manipulators because they understand people much better and more subtly than the rest.

    Fourth function


    Each of us has this function, but it is not important to us. There are and are. For example, you ask a person - what is your favorite music?

    - Yes, different! I love different music!

    He has the 4th emotion - he will listen to what they give. Or:

    - What is your favorite artist?

    He will think and say:

    - Shishkin!

    If he says “Van Gogh”, there is already reason to think that emotion is higher than 4th.

    The fourth function is a trifle. We use it, of course, when necessary. There is a 4th logic, and the brains work fine. A person with 4th physics has a body, right? So there is physics. And the 4th emotion exists. But it doesn’t seem to matter - we don’t worry about it and don’t get much pleasure from it - that’s why we are not developing this function.

    It is interesting! In extreme conditions, the 4th function is disabled. That is, a person with 4th physics in a crisis situation will simply be deprived of his legs, and he will not be able to move. A person with the 4th logic will cease to think at all.

    By the way, it’s very good for soldiers to have 4th emotion because in extreme situations they don’t lose their temper. Alexander the Great or Napoleon rushed into battle completely without fear, their emotions turned off. This is both good and bad, depending on the situation.

    First important note: process / result


    • 1st function - effective;
    • 2nd function - process;
    • 3rd function - process;
    • 4th function - effective.

    The first and fourth functions are effective . They worked, got the result - and thanks. And the second and third functions are process ones. This means that we enjoy the process itself, and not the result of using the function, and therefore we need to constantly use it:

    • Therefore, 2-physical, and even more 3-physical people cannot live without sports, and the 1st and especially 4th physics can do without it.
    • Therefore, a 1-logical person, no matter how smart he is, has absolutely no need to communicate with other smart people. He already knows that he is smart. Presented a typical IT specialist?

    A 2-logical person will die if he does not talk to anyone. He just buzzes at the sound of his own voice.

    Second important note: relevance and self-esteem


    • 1-я функция — Важно, ОК.
      Функция для нас важна и у нас с ней все в порядке;
    • 2-я функция — Важно, ОК
      Функция важна, но меньше, и у нас с ней тоже все в порядке.
      (На самом деле у нас с ней больше в порядке, чем с первой).
    • 3-я функция — Важно, не ОК.
      Это нам очень важно, но у нас не в порядке. Мы чувствуем свою ущербность.
    • 4-я функция — Не важно!

    Резюме: Все 4 функции не равны.

    Третье важное замечание


    You can say: “So, if you are a 1-logical person, and I am 4-logical, are you smarter than me?”

    No! In no case. IQ is in no way associated with the position of the logic . The place of a function in the hierarchy of a particular person is not related to the quality and degree of development of this function. There are great, very smart people, with the 4th logic. There are perfect idiots with 1st logic. The question is different - how do they evaluate themselves.

    A perfect idiot with 1st logic considers himself incredibly smart. Read some comments on Facebook. When I figured this out, I even stopped worrying about how you could be such an idiot. The idiocy with 1st logic goes well. Just a question of values ​​- a person with the 3rd logic can be incredibly smart, but he will always doubt his mind and behave accordingly.

    My dad had 3rd logic. He constantly received higher education just to prove his mind to himself and others. But at the same time, he had certain problems with the rationality of speech because the 3rd logic is usually expressed very specifically. My partner in UMI 3 has logic. I often have to translate his thoughts into human language so that other employees understand him.

    The position of the function determines the meaning, purpose, value and self-esteem, as well as the model of behavior and decision making , but not the quality of this function.

    • For example, a person with 1st physics considers himself beautiful, sexy, attractive by definition. However, he may not be very beautiful in fact.
    • A person with 3rd physics can be incredibly beautiful, but will constantly doubt it and bathe.
    • And a person with 4th physics absolutely does not care what he looks like. He has other values ​​in life besides the way he looks.

    Function Type Table


    To make it easier to remember the properties of functions, Afanasyev gave them very good “nicknames”.

    EmotionLogicsPhysicsWill
    1stRomanticDogmatistOwnerKing
    2ndActorRhetoricianHard workerNobleman
    3rdCrackerSkepticTouchyTradesman
    4thOnlookerSchoolboyLazy personSerf

    • Romantic - emotions just roll over;
    • Actor - emotions are the strongest side of such people;
    • Rusk - a man with a stone face.

      I have a lot of friends who are well versed in art, but their face is always stone. They never show their emotions outside - crackers!
    • Onlookers - that will give listen, then will listen. And you can not listen to anything at all!
    • Догматик — догма — это неоспоримая устоявшаяся картина его мира. Если что-то не вписывается в нее, то «это вы идиоты, а не я!»
    • Ритор — «А давайте обсудим, обменяемся мнениями!»
    • Скептик — «Я не знаю, правильно это или нет, мне надо подумать!»

      Мой 3-логичный товарищ на любой вопрос говорит «Мне надо подумать!» потому, что боится, что если он сразу ответит, он может сказать глупость и я подумаю, что он глуп. Это очень страшно для него
    • Школяр — «Чему научили, то я и знаю!»
    • Собственник имеет задачу — грести все себе: деньги, материальные блага, власть — что угодно!
    • Труженик — огромное количество энергии, которая не израсходована.
    • Недотрога. Это больше про девочек, но и про мальчиков тоже — очень избирательный, тонкий и чувствительный на уровне физики человек.
    • Лентяй — чтобы встать с дивана, этому человеку надо, чтобы вышестоящие функции очень сильно его об этом попросили. Иначе нет никакого смысла вставать с дивана потому, что на диване хорошо!
    • Царь — «Я царь. Точка. Здесь я решаю, что вы будете делать!»
    • Дворянин — принимает царя над собой, но и сам умеет повелевать.
    • Мещанин — проблема этого человека в том, что он хочет стать дворянином, как минимум, а еще лучше царем! Он постоянно парится по этому поводу, как и любая 3-я функция. Поэтому он всем доказывает, что он — не мещанин. Он на самом деле родом повыше будет!
    • Крепостной — «Решайте все за меня, пожалуйста! Я не хочу ничего решать. Я хочу платьице (если девочка) или новую машинку (если мальчик)»

    The overwhelming population of Russia is serfs. Least of all nobles and kings.

    The fact is that everything is transmitted genetically from parents to children, and during the Soviet regime all people with high will were systematically destroyed on a physical level. Therefore, in the main, we have 3-power power, and the population-4-free power. But the descendants of the surviving high-altitude still meet.

    Exercise




    Determine the psychotype of this character.

    Reason something like this. There are several hypotheses, for example:

    1. The first function is logic, this is obvious.

      The second emotion suggests that the person is a good actor. Is he a good actor? The second emotion suggests that a person feels very good about other people, has great empathy. Is this characteristic of him? Does he have any problems with self-esteem?
    2. What is his second? Will of course!

      The third function - what is his sore?
    3. Physics of course - “you sat in my place”, “you didn’t wash your hands”, “where are my sanitary napkins”? This is all the 3rd physics.
    4. And finally, with emotions he is all very tight - the same as with artistic taste.

    Result: 1st logic; 2nd will; 3rd physics; 4th emotions.

    Determine the psychotypes of Howard and Bernadette yourself.

    Hint: Why is Howard standing in such a pose in front of Bernadette? Think of how Bernadette stomps a leg.



    How to recognize a psychotype?


    Observe the human reaction. Of course, it is not necessary to introduce it into a stressful situation, but  under stress a person reacts exactly according to the sequence of functions . Since adults know how to restrain themselves, not necessarily a 1-physical man with any stress will immediately start to hit in the face. Maybe not, but if he drinks, yes - because his brakes will fail.

    If you take away your favorite toy from a 5-year-old child and look at the reaction, initially we will see the 1st function. If it does not work, 2nd, etc.

    1. For example, if the baby immediately starts yelling and crying, then the 1st emotion.
    2. If the first function does not work, the second is activated. Suppose he stamps his foot and says - give it back! This will is its 2nd function.
    3. Then he will begin to explain: “You understand that you have no right to take this toy from me because it is mine!” - 3rd logic turned on.
    4. Finally, if all else fails, he will climb out to fight and take the toy physically. So, 4th physics. (Or it won’t get it, because the 4th function may be disabled at all).

    Pay attention not only to the sequence of reactions, but also to the nuances - gestures, facial expressions, voice timbre, its emotionality.

    On the Internet there is a test Afanasyev , you can see.

    Can I change my / someone else's psychotype?


    - I determined my psychotype, and I do not like it. I want another, like Steve Jobs! Or like Napoleon. Can i change it?

    Answer: no, you can’t . We were born with a psychotype, as with a body - we will live with it all our lives.

    Harmonization of personality


    Another question - is it possible to harmonize your psychotype?

    The answer is yes!

    Any psychotype by nature is imperfect due to the pain of the 3rd function, underestimation of the 4th and redundancy of the 1st. Moreover, with age, the 1st function worsens.

    How to harmonize the psychotype?

    • First, moderate your 1st function .

      For me it is an emotion, and it was important for me to learn not to yell for any reason, for example, because of someone else's jambs at work. For several years I managed, now I bring up my wife. She also has 1st emotion. If the first 2 emotions do not moderate their ardor, imagine what a horror will stand in the house!
    • Secondly, to develop its 3rd function . Since 2nd everything is fine, you do not need to touch it. I remind you that the best way to harmonize your 3rd function is to constantly communicate with the person who has it 2nd.
    • Thirdly, pay attention that you have a 4th function, especially if it is physics. If you do not pay attention to it, then you can start your health.

    People often do that. Afanasyev himself was 4-physical, so he died quite early.

    How to interact in a basic way


    Our first function is a sledgehammer , a tractor.

    • 1st emotion - adjust to your mood.

    If a person with the 1st emotion is in a bad mood, do not try to change it, adjust to it. This is not a process function, but an effective one. Therefore, a 1-emotional person in a bad mood does not care what the mood of others.

    • 1st logic - do not argue, do not persuade.

    To argue with the 1st logic is useless. He is a dogma, in his head is already an established picture of the world. There is a proven technique: you need to put some thought into it, step away and allow the thought to mature. Then he will say that he himself came up with this: "By the way, I was thinking ..."

    • 1st physics - use the attributes of affluence for your own weight in his eyes, no aggression, give gifts, give compliments.
    • 1st will - do not push, do not try to persuade to change the decision, adjust. Do not even try to pass the 1st will! It is absolutely useless against a man with such a sledgehammer.

    The third function is our weakest side, it is important to spare them . But if you want to hit someone harder, you have to hit it!

    • 3rd emotion - very afraid of tantrums, generally emotional outbursts. If they shout at such a person, he turns to stone, turns around, leaves, and never returns. Therefore, communicate calmly, kindly, without strong emotions.
    • 3rd logic - very fond of everyone stressing how smart and competent he is. Emphasize it!
    • 3rd will - loves showing self-respect, demonstrating his importance and understanding that he is valued. Emphasize importance, show respect!
    • 3rd physics - make an expensive gift, a compliment to your appearance or prosperity: “You look great! You are so sporty! You have such a cool car! ”This all works for 3rd physics to work perfectly.

    How not to offend


    Blows on 2 and 4 functions to a person are indifferent.

    For example, tell me that I'm stupid, I still won’t believe it. I will not even be offended. But show me disrespect, I will remember this for life because I have the 2nd logic, the 3rd will.

    The most painful blow is of course the 3rd function . In principle, the 1st one can also be hit, although this is not so painful.

    Tell me that I do not understand art - ha ha ha! But in fact, I’ll think anyway: “Maybe I'm not good at it yet?” For me it’s just very important.

    Summary

    A person can be offended only by his 3rd and partly by 1st functions:

    • 3 - because we ourselves know her weakness and suffer;
    • 1 - because we identify with it;
    • 2 - will not believe;
    • 4 - it doesn't matter.

    Russians


    Traditionally, Russian women are more volitional, we have a feminine, rather than a courageous nation (remember Hofstede). In a typical Russian family, the main wife.

    menwomen
    high emotionhigh physics
    high physicshigh will
    low will
    low logic

    IT people


    But IT people are not like the Russians as a whole. Over the years of typing all the employees of my company, I highlighted that 80% of IT people belong to 2 psychotypes:

    • Logic, Will, Emotion, Physics - Einstein
    • Logic, Will, Physics, Emotion - Lao Tzu

    That is, with rare exceptions, these are 2-freedoms and 1-logical people. Their physics and emotions are low, but for our work this is not so important.

    • High logic (often 1st) gives a feeling of intellectual superiority, it is useless to argue with them.
    • High (usually 2nd) will makes a person freedom-loving and independent.
    • Low physics - typical IT people are not so much interested in money, fame and women.
    • Emotion generally does not play a big role in the work, with rare exceptions.

    Thus, my management comes down to questions of how my psychotype works with two others: Einstein and Lao Tzu. They are also very easy to distinguish from each other:

    Einstein dresses like a bum and less often washes;Lao Tzu  - dandy: elegantly dressed, cuts his beard in a barber shop - he just has the 3rd physicist.

    Otherwise, they behave very similarly.

    Managers


    Ideal candidate:

    • High will is an ideal project, even 1-freed.
    • 3rd will is an ideal account because it needs to negotiate with customers. Among the clients are tyrants, and 3-volts are the best manipulators. They will adapt to all and achieve their own.
    • It is best to take people to work with 2-3 physics because it is processional, which means that such employees are not lazy and very efficient.

    To avoid:

    • 1st and 4th physics, especially 4th, are usually negligent people. Moreover, 1-physical ones are thieves, and 4-physical ones are lazy and listless.
    • 4-freed managers should not be hired because they are easily manipulated, non-self-dependent and do not like to make decisions themselves. These are serfs who are waiting for someone to make a decision for them.

    But 4-freed people work for me, they just need to be able to cook. Naturally, if necessary, make any important decision, they immediately come and ask:

    - What to do?
    - And what you yourself will not decide?
    - Well ...

    Therefore, if you need responsible and independent employees, in no case do not hire the 4th will.

    On this, our brief acquaintance with applied psychology comes to an end.



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