Grunt but give

    “Easier than it sounds” is a business novel about what programmers are still capable of.


    They reached the office in silence. Stas sat down at his computer, began to enter the password for unlocking, but suddenly stopped and turned to Sergey.

    - Come on, tell us what was discussed there. - Stas folded his hands on his stomach and prepared to listen.

    - Any garbage was discussed. - Sergey did not sit down. He went to the windowsill, gazed a little at the snowfall, and turned to his colleague.

    - Well, nothing interesting right? - asked Stas. - You kind of wanted to discuss the reasons for the discrepancies in the warehouse.

    - Well, they wanted to. Petrova ran into the chief accountant, she fought back. They talked about Stas.

    - About me? - rounded eyes Stas. - What am I doing here?

    - Yes, not you, but from the warehouse Stas. - answered Sergey. - Mezentsev like. They said he tyrit spare parts and drags them to the assembly.

    “Ah, yes, I know that.” - Stas nodded his head. - Fool like that. At corporate party got drunk, danced like mad. They got tired of sending him home later.

    - Why? Didn't want to leave?

    - Not at all. - Stas waved his hand. “He has a car, in short, no, he usually drives home from someone from the warehouse, and then everyone who is lucky will get buh?” They called him a taxi, a young guy arrived, and that - well, Stas - is ... In short, he vomited him right in front of the car. The taxi driver says - go to FIG, I’m not going to carry such a cattle, I have a new car.

    - Pf, as if this is his car. - answered Sergey. - Surely from a taxi park.

    - No, we called Uber, he was on his own.

    - And what, how did it end? - Sergey asked without much interest.

    - They decided that it was impossible to enter the same river twice. - laughed Stas. - Since it has already been twisted, then this will not happen again. They called another car, and he drove off normally.

    - I see. - Sergey nodded. - Thanks for the interesting story.

    - You are welcome. - Stas shrugged. - There really was fun, you do not go in vain. One well-known aunt even danced on the table. Do you know who?

    “I don't know, and I don't want to know.” - snapped Sergey. - That's why I don’t go. I don’t want to see people in this state, then you won’t understand how to relate to them at work.

    - OK, as you want. Let's talk about what was at the meeting. What are the reasons for the discrepancy with us?

    “So, I told you about Stas ...” Sergey muttered thoughtfully. - And, Petrova also said that she worked before in some Western system, and there she could not edit movements for past periods.

    - So it is impossible with us. - Stas frowned. - The chief accountant sets the date of the ban on editing, and no one else can change anything.

    - Well, and when does she put it? - Stas stopped frowning and broke into a smile. - God grant, if in a month. I’ll tell you so ...

    What Stas wanted to say there remained a mystery, because the door to the office opened and Galina came in with a strange smile on her face, followed by Valeria, the chief accountant.

    - Sergey, what kind of garbage again? - Strange, Galina seemed indignant, but the smile never left her face. - Why does accounting have problems, but do I have to solve them?

    Sergey stared at Galina. What are you up to again, underwater viper? Why are you smiling? Why did I take the chief accountant with me?

    - What's the problem? - cautiously asked Sergey.

    - Well, how ... - Galina began, staring at Sergey. - The year is over, we must close it, and you are rushing about with your projects (Galina singled out the letter “e”). Do you think that since you are working with the owner, can you now abandon your duties?

    - I didn’t ask you, Galina. - Sergey said as firmly as possible. - Valeria, what's the problem?

    “It doesn't matter to me who you asked!” - sharply turned to a squeal Galina. - Are you completely fucked up, or what? Will you tell me what to say, with whom to talk, and when to talk? Yes, I am you ...

    - So can you talk without me then? - Sergey felt himself starting to blush. The feeling was not pleasant.

    - Yes, we’ve already talked! - continued to scream Galina. - What am I going to work for you now? A? While you rush about your meetings?

    “Great idea, by the way.” - Sergey pulled a smile on his face. - Come on, show us a sample of how to work. And then where are we, the bespontovye suckers, to your universal ...

    - Well, hold on! - Galina raised her hand, pointed a finger at Sergey and, for some reason, she began to shake this finger. “I won’t leave it like that!” I do not care about your projects (hmm, there were no letters "e")! But when you fill up the reporting, and they solder the fine to us, twenty percent of the revenue, let's see how you will smile!

    Sergei did not know how to swear, especially with such expressive ladies as Galina. She, like an energy vampire, sucks out all the energy when she succumbs to provocation. And every time I thought - what to do? To be silent? Then you will look like a loser - there is a tangle of like-minded people. Whoever yells louder is right, and who is silent is a rag.

    Speak? What should I say? The conversation is clearly not about working issues. Just a bazaar, as sometimes happens in the yard, or in the market. Eh, the introvert managed to be born.

    “I won’t leave that either.” - looking at his feet, Sergey said uncertainly. - I did not give up any work duties, I complete all tasks on time, which is the main complaint ...

    - Yes, in the same thing, as always! - Galina did not let Sergey finish. As they said at the military department at the institute, it developed success. “You are standing here, you are skillful, instead of working!” And I rake shit out for you and listen to you every day.

    - Yes, you poor thing ... - Sergey gathered up impudence and looked at Galina.

    - Well, that's the end ... - Galina turned sharply and quickly went towards the door. Before leaving, she stopped, turned around, raised her finger again and pointed at Sergey. - Get ready for a serious conversation!

    And she went out, slamming the door. Valeria was silently embarrassed. Stas, as usual, was staring at the monitor and pretending to do something very important. Sergey's hands were shaking - as always, after a conversation with Galina.

    - Valeria, take a seat! - Stas looked up from the monitor, pulled out a guest chair from under the table and moved it to Valeria. - Come on, tell us what happened.

    “Have fun ...” Valeria said, sitting down in a chair. “I don’t even know how to say something now.” I was not going to swear at all, Galina apparently had some interests of her own, so she took advantage of the moment.

    - So this is her job, to use the moments, to catch the wave, and ride on it, forward and upward. - said Sergey. He walked away from the window, sat down in his seat, turned to Valeria. - Come on, tell me what happened?

    “Nothing really happened ...” Valeria shrugged. - As always. The year is over, we have to close it, check everything, so I went in.

    - Why Galina? - sighed Sergey. - She will not help you, she’s not a programmer.

    “Well, you weren’t there, so I looked at her.” - Valeria seemed a little outraged. - What am I to look for you to run?

    - Okay. - said conciliatoryly Sergey. - What do we need from us?

    - The girls will work in the evening, you will already go home. - Valeria has extinguished the growing fervor of the conflict. - Give us access so that we can change documents for the whole year.

    “So you yourself can.” - calmly said Sergey. “I gave you access control rights.” You can manage this process yourself.

    - Yes, I do not want to manage anything. - Valeria said in a slightly raised tone. It seems, after all, that conflict cannot be avoided. - You are programmers, you manage. And I will say to whom what access to give.

    - Valeria, do you need it? - Sergey still hoped for a calm conversation. There are no forces left after Galina. - Run to us, ask, call in the evening and on weekends, so that we give you this unfortunate access.

    - I'm not going to run to you! - Valeria's tone was getting higher. - I went in normally, and normally ask - open everything to us (obviously there was an emphasis on this word)! We will work calmly, and you will rest. As always.

    - Ah, got it. - Sergey nodded his head. - Again, you think that the system belongs only to you, and no rules apply to you? Give us this, give us something, complete freedom, no restrictions, will we shit in the database?

    - What is wrong with you! - Valeria was indignant. - How do you even allow yourself to talk? What is there in your database at all? Who needs it, except for accounting?

    - Everyone needs it, are you up to date on the project? - continued Sergey. - Everyone wants to see real data, numbers, for management and analysis there.

    - Oh my God! - suddenly smiled Valeria. - Sergey, you are so small. They thought up some nonsense with Kurchatov ... Use numbers. They didn’t use spawn, and then suddenly they got caught in the tail.

    “Well, if you think so ...” Sergei shook his hands. “Why were you silent at the meeting?” When did Kurchatov announce that stock order is the project of the year?

    “Nda ...” Valeria shook her head, looking at Sergey. - You’ll become the boss, you’ll understand what you need to say at the meetings, and what you don’t need.

    Sergey could not find what to answer. Where do they all come from, these teachers? And there is really nothing to object to, he has almost no experience in managerial work, how everything is arranged there - one can only guess. If you start to talk about what you need to do, and not sit nicely in high offices - they will laugh like a pimple romance, sighing about a big and clean ...

    - Well, so, Sergey? - Valeria unceremoniously interrupted her thoughts. - Open access?

    - What documents will you correct? - sighed Sergey.

    - What we need, we will. - Valeria brazenly looked into her eyes, as if provoking.

    - Will you correct movements in the warehouse? - without any hope, Sergei asked.

    - First of all. - Valeria did not take her eyes off.

    - Well, now we will give you full rights in the system. - Sergey sighed again and looked at Valeria. - And then by the logs we will see what and where you corrected.

    - Yes, you stare as much as you like. - Valeria grinned, got up from her chair and headed for the door.

    “Why are you arguing with her?” Stas asked when the door behind Valeria closed. “We always do this when they close a quarter or a year.”

    - I’m arguing that I need to put the warehouse in order. - answered Sergey irritably. - If before it didn’t care, now - no. How much can you stand in this pose?

    - In what position? - did not understand Stas.

    - In that one! Knee-elbow. Grunt, but give.

    “There you are ...” Stas said longly. - Swung to the holy! Do you want the bukh right to pick up something? Backdating data?

    - Yes I want to. Otherwise, nothing will work.

    - So they hang themselves. - smiled Stas. - For the Russian accountant, the inability to fix the old jamb is worse than the apocalypse. It’s easier for them to make half the salary than to get the data to be entered right the first time. Since childhood, we are used to leaving everything for later. At the end of the quarter, or year, or in general ...

    - Well, this method of accounting is no longer suitable for us. - Sergey said seriously. “Having so many people with full access is a huge hole in accounting security.”

    - And what, how are you going to close this hole? - Stas carefully looked at Sergey. - Just boarded up?

    - Hmm ... A hole ... In the fence ... - Sergey muttered thoughtfully.

    - What? In which fence? - sincerely became interested in Stas.

    - Yes, so ... I remembered ... Now I will tell.

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