September 13, 2017 at 00:01That root stood and features were
Today is the 256th day of the year, which means a professional holiday has come for programmers, developers, developers, coders. In general, all those who make modern life modern, smart technology, convenient work - in short, improves this world. We thought for a long time what to write, but in the end we came across cool fresh comics about the life of developers and decided that they would be day and place. For those who, like ours, have an English Polytechnic Finish, we have translated the meaning and adapted a little to Russian realities. Happy holiday, friends!
The picture is taken here , our signature.
A few words about how it was. We found the comics of great authors on the Toggl timetrack developers blog and could no longer stop looking at them. They wrote technical support on their bad english that we are smallCRM-systems company is a developer from Russia and we want to publish this case on the day of the programmer in our blog on Habré. We were told that they give their consent and that english is not so bad. On this positive note, we sat down for the translation and adaptation. Work on this post was really high - there is something to grieve and laugh at.
It’s hard to bea developer god , even if you work in a vendor company. We all come to work and, horrified, we are surrounded by people who, on the one hand, consider us to be a race like aliens, and on the other, believe in our superpowers. So who are all these people?
Analysts, SEO employees and lead generators. In our opinion, Internet marketers. Black Internet magicians, pumped in the dark art of generating clicks (not to be confused with clickbait!), Traffic and conversions. Yes, yes, we really found this comic by the search query.
Technical support. Frontline troops with steel nerves. Support commandos have a strange ability to say “No” in such a way that it doesn't sound like “No” (we would have to do this in the process of creating TK and making the 458th iteration of edits!). Technical support is mainly peaceful (for exhausted?).
Financial Director (in Russian realities - accounting).Keeper of the treasury and treasure. Concerned about servicing financial obligations. Often he says “No,” but on the whole sometimes he allows some expenses for stupid requests in order to maintain peace and the illusion of democracy in the company. In Russian realities, he owns powerful weapons of mass destruction of programmers and tyzh programmers (usually by labor - system administrators) - the 1C accounting system.
SMM box. Hipster by profession or professional hipster - it depends on the level of zen achieved. Prefers to communicate using GIFs app. SMM hipsters are the only ones who can indicate Twitter or Facebook skills as a skill in their resume.
Product Manager.Money stops here. On his keyboard there are hot keys for a set of phrases “Do it”, “How difficult is it?”, “No”, we often met - “Urgent. Important". Not very friendly.
Frontend developers , they are also “not true engineers” in the jargon of backends. Strong in classic rock or gangsta rap (or both). The strangeness of their hobby can only be compared with the inscriptions on their T-shirts.
Office Ninja. Ever wondered where all these colored stickers, free cookies and work gadgets come from? This is the work of the office ninja. True ninjas always go unnoticed - only their work is visible.
CEO, aka CEO, boss, boss, etc.He is a particularly important person. He feels most comfortable in the face of new challenges, so expect big changes (or a sudden release of a new product) when everything starts to work very smoothly.
The backend developer is a glamorous techie. Vigilant defender and silent knight - he keeps the business working and generally afloat. He is the hero that the company deserves (but not the one she needs).
(a transfer unit thanks to the conf )
Option of Lonsofore - «of He's the hero the Company About enterprise | Deserves (But not the one's IT Needs).» - «He is - the hero, which the company deserves (but not the only one that it needs)."
We to RegionSoftwe don’t undertake to divide the developers into a backend and frontend due to the fact that we generally do desktop software for business, and we have all the full stack. But as for the heroes and silent knights - yes, we like it. Much better than t-shirts with head and body designation using tags.
Statewide designer. A rare beast, since the most creative prefer to roam free, jumping from project to project. In order to avoid escape or violent rebellion, it is better for them to transfer all control over the creative.
Servers. Only they work 24/7. Be like a server ...
Developers often make fun of colleagues and situations, but in fact, in each company, programmers have a personal hell. With seven circles, limb and other attributes.
The first circle , in fact, the developer’s Dante limb, is to stay awake and be out of the house at noon (without access to the Playstation).
The second circle is people. And the documentation, the documentation, this whole, too, really sickened. Marketing and sales, and their eternal, is this: “Have you already filled half of your site? You work a little, am I right? ”(Amirite is short for“ am I right? ”). Type-technical HRs live on the same circle: “Hi, do you know JavaScript? Well, because we are just in search of a Java programmer! ”
The third circle is customers (well, this is the third in the original, here, like any CRM-system developer, this is the ninth and additional some). Wild people. Cave. Especially advanced enrage. Well, those who send heaps of new ideas and "very small changes."
The fourth circle is hot. Managers, products, managers - evil spirits! They will entrap you, block the oxygen and tryndet: "Well, what, has it been done? Well, already done? Done, huh? Well, is it ready now? ”They are lovers of useless meetings. Sometimes they really talk about what they ate for lunch! (We have not seen this, but the Expert video about the red lines from the customer is familiar to many of us).
The fifth circle of hell is a bad code. Oh, the sins of the programmer. Legacy code in the bud hacks your best ideas and devours your brain, your own old code burns your memory and eyes with shame. Separately, there are mountains of crutches, bicycles and other wild solutions that support everything at once and are developed on some kind of muddy stack.
Sixth circle -separation and distraction from work. “Are you busy with something?” (Well, at work, how can you!) “Can you upload some data to me?” Yes, no, I’m not in a hurry, I’ll arrange it tonight. On the same circle is the mythical abyss “Yesterday” - a place where everything should be ready according to today's information.
Do not believe that we suffer from this? Do not believe me ?! Just look at this old and true comic book.
And on the last lap the source of internal light and energy breaks down - a coffee machine :-)
Office guys know a lot about their work, but from the outside it looks very specific. Let’s take an example of a blown bulb.
IT support, technical support. They unscrew the light bulb and screw it back in the hope that it will light up, then click the switch. If the manipulation does not succeed, inform the client that the room is still in the dark and it is worth ordering a new room from the warehouse.
Frontend developers paint the lamp yellow and rub the backend so that the lamp works, but only in the daytime.
The project manager figures a baseball bat on a working light bulb, the lamp is ultimately broken - and a new ticket falls on the front-end.
Marketers develop a concept and agree that darkness is a new light. And then the marketer gives you the opportunity to read a blog post about this, and he goes to play in Candy Crush.
Telemarketer(for Khabrovites who are not in the topic, in Russian realities these are girls on cold calls) brings more light bulbs, even more, quite a lot of light bulbs.
The content manager has no idea what to do with this. Then he sits down and writes an expert article for 2000 words about changing a light bulb.
The operator (someone has a supply manager, someone has a system administrator, someone has a secretary) receives a message that they need to fix the light, give out a flashlight and continue to sleep with a clear conscience.
Backend developers are amazed at where everyone got problems with these bulbs, recalls that he forgot to put light into the database, calms down, and blames the front end.
No jokes, but fewer bugs for all of us, more adequacy, salaries and mutual understanding within companies and with customers. Happy programmer all involved!
Translation and adaptation - developer of CRM systems RegionSoft Developer Studio Image source -
time tracker developer blog Toggl.com KDPV
source - comment by Penta_Club
P.S. photographer portal user : if you have more successful ideas for fragment translation, write in the comments - add.
The picture is taken here , our signature.A few words about how it was. We found the comics of great authors on the Toggl timetrack developers blog and could no longer stop looking at them. They wrote technical support on their bad english that we are smallCRM-systems company is a developer from Russia and we want to publish this case on the day of the programmer in our blog on Habré. We were told that they give their consent and that english is not so bad. On this positive note, we sat down for the translation and adaptation. Work on this post was really high - there is something to grieve and laugh at.
Programmer's working environment
It’s hard to be
Analysts, SEO employees and lead generators. In our opinion, Internet marketers. Black Internet magicians, pumped in the dark art of generating clicks (not to be confused with clickbait!), Traffic and conversions. Yes, yes, we really found this comic by the search query.
Technical support. Frontline troops with steel nerves. Support commandos have a strange ability to say “No” in such a way that it doesn't sound like “No” (we would have to do this in the process of creating TK and making the 458th iteration of edits!). Technical support is mainly peaceful (for exhausted?).
Financial Director (in Russian realities - accounting).Keeper of the treasury and treasure. Concerned about servicing financial obligations. Often he says “No,” but on the whole sometimes he allows some expenses for stupid requests in order to maintain peace and the illusion of democracy in the company. In Russian realities, he owns powerful weapons of mass destruction of programmers and tyzh programmers (usually by labor - system administrators) - the 1C accounting system.
SMM box. Hipster by profession or professional hipster - it depends on the level of zen achieved. Prefers to communicate using GIFs app. SMM hipsters are the only ones who can indicate Twitter or Facebook skills as a skill in their resume.
Product Manager.Money stops here. On his keyboard there are hot keys for a set of phrases “Do it”, “How difficult is it?”, “No”, we often met - “Urgent. Important". Not very friendly.
Frontend developers , they are also “not true engineers” in the jargon of backends. Strong in classic rock or gangsta rap (or both). The strangeness of their hobby can only be compared with the inscriptions on their T-shirts.
Office Ninja. Ever wondered where all these colored stickers, free cookies and work gadgets come from? This is the work of the office ninja. True ninjas always go unnoticed - only their work is visible.
CEO, aka CEO, boss, boss, etc.He is a particularly important person. He feels most comfortable in the face of new challenges, so expect big changes (or a sudden release of a new product) when everything starts to work very smoothly.
The backend developer is a glamorous techie. Vigilant defender and silent knight - he keeps the business working and generally afloat. He is the hero that the company deserves (but not the one she needs).
(a transfer unit thanks to the conf )
Option of Lonsofore - «of He's the hero the Company About enterprise | Deserves (But not the one's IT Needs).» - «He is - the hero, which the company deserves (but not the only one that it needs)."
We to RegionSoftwe don’t undertake to divide the developers into a backend and frontend due to the fact that we generally do desktop software for business, and we have all the full stack. But as for the heroes and silent knights - yes, we like it. Much better than t-shirts with head and body designation using tags.
Statewide designer. A rare beast, since the most creative prefer to roam free, jumping from project to project. In order to avoid escape or violent rebellion, it is better for them to transfer all control over the creative.
Servers. Only they work 24/7. Be like a server ...
Seven circles of hell developers
Developers often make fun of colleagues and situations, but in fact, in each company, programmers have a personal hell. With seven circles, limb and other attributes.
The first circle , in fact, the developer’s Dante limb, is to stay awake and be out of the house at noon (without access to the Playstation).
The second circle is people. And the documentation, the documentation, this whole, too, really sickened. Marketing and sales, and their eternal, is this: “Have you already filled half of your site? You work a little, am I right? ”(Amirite is short for“ am I right? ”). Type-technical HRs live on the same circle: “Hi, do you know JavaScript? Well, because we are just in search of a Java programmer! ”
The third circle is customers (well, this is the third in the original, here, like any CRM-system developer, this is the ninth and additional some). Wild people. Cave. Especially advanced enrage. Well, those who send heaps of new ideas and "very small changes."
The fourth circle is hot. Managers, products, managers - evil spirits! They will entrap you, block the oxygen and tryndet: "Well, what, has it been done? Well, already done? Done, huh? Well, is it ready now? ”They are lovers of useless meetings. Sometimes they really talk about what they ate for lunch! (We have not seen this, but the Expert video about the red lines from the customer is familiar to many of us).
The fifth circle of hell is a bad code. Oh, the sins of the programmer. Legacy code in the bud hacks your best ideas and devours your brain, your own old code burns your memory and eyes with shame. Separately, there are mountains of crutches, bicycles and other wild solutions that support everything at once and are developed on some kind of muddy stack.
Sixth circle -separation and distraction from work. “Are you busy with something?” (Well, at work, how can you!) “Can you upload some data to me?” Yes, no, I’m not in a hurry, I’ll arrange it tonight. On the same circle is the mythical abyss “Yesterday” - a place where everything should be ready according to today's information.
Do not believe that we suffer from this? Do not believe me ?! Just look at this old and true comic book.
And on the last lap the source of internal light and energy breaks down - a coffee machine :-)
But we all know how to work. In a team. In his own way
Office guys know a lot about their work, but from the outside it looks very specific. Let’s take an example of a blown bulb.
IT support, technical support. They unscrew the light bulb and screw it back in the hope that it will light up, then click the switch. If the manipulation does not succeed, inform the client that the room is still in the dark and it is worth ordering a new room from the warehouse.
Frontend developers paint the lamp yellow and rub the backend so that the lamp works, but only in the daytime.
The project manager figures a baseball bat on a working light bulb, the lamp is ultimately broken - and a new ticket falls on the front-end.
Marketers develop a concept and agree that darkness is a new light. And then the marketer gives you the opportunity to read a blog post about this, and he goes to play in Candy Crush.
Telemarketer(for Khabrovites who are not in the topic, in Russian realities these are girls on cold calls) brings more light bulbs, even more, quite a lot of light bulbs.
The content manager has no idea what to do with this. Then he sits down and writes an expert article for 2000 words about changing a light bulb.
The operator (someone has a supply manager, someone has a system administrator, someone has a secretary) receives a message that they need to fix the light, give out a flashlight and continue to sleep with a clear conscience.
Backend developers are amazed at where everyone got problems with these bulbs, recalls that he forgot to put light into the database, calms down, and blames the front end.
No jokes, but fewer bugs for all of us, more adequacy, salaries and mutual understanding within companies and with customers. Happy programmer all involved!
Translation and adaptation - developer of CRM systems RegionSoft Developer Studio Image source -
time tracker developer blog Toggl.com KDPV
source - comment by Penta_Club
P.S. photographer portal user : if you have more successful ideas for fragment translation, write in the comments - add.
