8 tips every day for those who want to be happy (part 1)
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The daily routine is sometimes so addictive that we do not have time to look around us. And when, finally, the time for this is found, it turns out that life is not so rosy . Is it possible to change something? Yes! Special studies will show what exactly should be changed in order to get closer to the feeling of cloudless happiness .
Professor Sonia Lubomirski of the University of California gives details of research that show what all the lucky ones have in common.
Excerpt from The Secret of Happiness ★ :
1. They devote a large amount of time to family and friends, nourishing these relationships and enjoying them.They may be upset and not hold back emotions in exactly the same circumstances as you or me, but their secret weapon is the balance and strength that they exert in the fight against the problem.
2. They are able to express gratitude for everything they have.
3. They are often the first to offer a helping hand to colleagues and passers-by.
4. Thinking about the future, they think positively .
5. They enjoy life and try to live in the present.
6. They perform physical exercise every week or even daily.
7. They are deeply loyal to some idea, and they always have a dream of their whole life (whether it is the fight against fraud, the construction of closets or teaching their children values that they are deeply convinced of).
8. Last but not least, during times of stress, crisis, and even tragedy, the lucky ones share their feelings.
I think the post could end here. Everyone has their own answers. But do you want to get only general information? Or do you really want to be happier?
The Internet has become an oasis of ideas that we never realize, tricks that we forget to use.
Reading the list is easy. Realizing these ideas in your own life can be more difficult.
But not necessarily. Let's get down to business.
“Subscribe for happiness”
Here is one interesting fact about happiness: frequency is more important than intensity. What does it mean?
Many small good deeds will make you happier than a few grandiose ones.
Studies show that church attendance and physical activity give people a disproportionate sense of happiness. Why it happens?
Such moments provide us with regular support.
Stanford University professor, Jennifer Aaker, says that everything is really that simple: do what makes you happy more often.
We set the working hours. We are planning a visit to the doctor. Heck, we even plan on going to the hairdresser.
We say that happiness is the most important thing, but we do not include it in our schedule.
Research shows that 40% of happiness comes from intentional activity. Your level of happiness can change up to 40% of what you decide to do every day (the level of happiness can be divided into the following components:
- intentional activity 40%;
- circumstances 10%;
- the so-called predetermined value of 50%)
And much of what you do, you do on autopilot. 40% of what you do every day is not the result of any decisions, it's just a habit.
Excerpt from “Strength of habit: Why we do what we do in life and business” ★ :
One article published by a researcher at Duke University in 2006 said that more than 40 percent of the actions that people do every day are not real solutions, but a habit.
See what I'm getting at?
What brings happiness should become a habit. Part of everyday life. Part of your schedule.
Stop waiting for happy coincidences, you need a “subscription to happiness”.
So how do we make a list and not forget about it by completing its items every day? Let's start.
1) Waking up, yawn and say OVB!
Even scientific advice about happiness is often commonplace. Now I will talk about them, although so everything is on the surface ...
It really works.
Why did I advise you to say OVB after waking up? This abbreviation stands for:
1. Expectation
2. Recollection
3. Gratitude
I already wrote about the importance of the morning ritual and that studies show that your mood in the morning determines the whole day . So start it right.
Waiting is a powerful stimulator of happiness. 2 for the price of 1: you get something good and become happy as you wait.
So think about what you look forward to. Nothing? Plan something.
Memories of good points have a positive effect. They allow us to bring to life the best moments and relive stress.
Excerpt from The Secret of Happiness ★ :
People who are inclined to be in anticipation of something, to enjoy waiting and fantasizing about future happy events, are most likely optimistic and have strong positive emotions. But those who look back, remembering happy times and reliving that joy, are better able to cope with stress.
And thanks, perhaps the sister of happiness. It cannot be said better:
... the more a person is inclined to feel gratitude, the less likely that he or she is prone to depression, anxiety, loneliness, envy or neurosis.
This combination often leads to optimism, the presence of which suggests that a person is happy.
Yes, everything is so trite, and yet, waking up, say the OVB! And then do a little ritual of expectation, memory, and gratitude.
All this is wonderful. But what do you do when you get out of bed?
2) Enjoy your morning coffee
Take a moment and enjoy the coffee for real . Enjoy its aroma, taste. Rate it. Trite? Maybe.
But studies show that enjoying beautiful moments is exactly what distinguishes lucky people from average people.
I believe some of you will say, “But I don’t drink coffee.” And I will answer you: "This is not a problem."
It could be anything you do every morning.
Such a daily ritual will not be in vain, since studies show that rituals matter.
To your attention - the words of a professor at Harvard University, Francesca Gino:
You can invent your own rituals. What do they give? They make us a little more attentive to what we consume. Thanks to this, we ultimately relish the food or what we drink, moreover, we enjoy the process, and, in fact, now we are ready to pay a higher price for all this. Once again: rituals are useful in the sense that they contribute to greater enjoyment of what is happening to us.
What other joyful habits can we add to our schedule?
3) You will have to sweat on the road to happiness
When you study people in the hope of understanding what makes them happy, you get three answers: sex, communication, and exercise.
Excerpt from “Building happiness: A new approach to creating a happy life” ★ :
Their results confirm what was previously known: the level of the so-called hormone of happiness rises during sex, exercise or communication, or when you focus on the moment here and now, and decreases, for example, during a trip, as well as when you are dispersed .
People who exercise are generally psychologically healthier: they are less prone to depression, fits of rage, stress and distrust.
Excerpt from Spark: A New Revolutionary Science Studying the Effect of Exercise on the Brain ★ :
A large-scale Dutch study of 19,288 twins and their families, published in 2006, showed that exercise makes people less anxious, less depressed and less neurotic, as well as more sociable.
A Finnish study of 3,403 people in 1999 found that those who exercise at least two to three times less experience depression, anger, stress, and “cynical distrust” than those who are less active or not at all not engaged in physical exercise.
Don't like exercise? You just picked the wrong ones.
Running, weight lifting, any sports game ... Find something that you like and make you move.
So, it's time to get to work. What is the best way to start the day? This is what will make you happier.
4) Five minute service
Who lives to a very old age? Not those who are being helped. Ironically, these are those who provide assistance.
Excerpt from “Longevity Project: unexpected discoveries about health and longevity based on the results of the 80-year Landmark study” ★ :
We decided that if a participant sincerely believes that he or she has friends and relatives whom you can rely on in difficult times, then he will be healthier. We predicted that those who felt loved and cared for would live longer. A surprise awaited us: our forecast was incorrect ... Those who help their friends and neighbors give practical advice and care for others, as a rule, live to a very old age.
And a great way to take care of others is the “5-minute service” ★ Adam Rifkin, which does not take too much time:
Every day, do something selfless for someone that would take up to five minutes. What you do should be of great importance to the person who accepts the service. That is the whole point. Typically, these services take the form of dating, recommendations, reviews or mentions on social networks.
So take five minutes to do something that is insignificant for you, but will be of great benefit to someone.
This is good for karma, and science says that in a sense, karma is real.
Yes, those who do a lot for others, at first glance, give. But, as Adam Grant of Wharton established, the “givers” are also more successful:
Then I looked at this question from the other side and thought about what if the “givers” are below, who is at the top. In fact, I was very surprised to find that again the "givers." People who are constantly looking for ways to help others are abundantly represented not only at the bottom, but also at the top of the pyramid of success.
To be continued!
PS We recommend one more article on the topic - 7 steps towards your goals .
The author of the translation is Vyacheslav Davidenko, founder of MBA Consult .