A few stories from life

Hello! I would like to share a small selection of stories from our lives. All a good mood and have a nice day!

On the work for the customer

How to ship the server be called, so he will float will work

When setting up servers for the customer, we paid attention to their names. One had the proud name of Pharaoh (Faraon), and the second incomprehensible Nomarch (Nomarch). Thinking, not over the configuration, over the name. They began to search. It turned out that Nomarch is one of the highest official positions in Ancient Egypt. Namely: the representative of the pharaoh, responsible for managing the administrative area. An analogue of the governor in the modern world. We looked at each other, felt the scale of the names. We thought again, but now on our servers. Two of them are called Zinaida and Dzhigurda ...

Checking combat readiness

One of our customers decided to check the security of their infrastructure from DDoS attacks. Protective equipment provided to the customer by the provider. An initiator of a test DDoS attack was found on the boundless expanses of the Internet. This person, who promised to conduct a DDoS attack, gave a guarantee that their product is of high quality and that no matter what the customer does, nothing will help. Armed with popcorn monitoring tools, we began to wait for the attack to begin. At the appointed time, everything, as promised, lay down. True, as it turned out, it was "laid down" not only by our customer, but also by a number of other companies, including the data center, where the customer's equipment was located. Either the potion was too powerful, or the performer was “ordered” by others, or just a coincidence.

Communications

Nowadays, there are a lot of means of communication. Phone and email are often not enough. Therefore, customers use Skype, Viber, etc. to communicate with engineers. The main thing here is not to confuse the contact and not send anything superfluous. So in the process of implementing one of the projects, the customer chose Viber as the main means of communication. Everything was fine until the engineer sent the following message: “Hello, Kisul. How are you?". Perhaps the customer had the idea that our engineer was thus trying to check the status of Cisco configurable equipment. Just confused Viber and SNMP. But he decided to keep quiet tactfully. True, further communication from the customer went only through email and phone.


The most reliable server in the World

Once in a conversation, the customer mentioned that the servers of a particular vendor are the best. He explained his statement by the fact that these servers work even after you fill them several times with water. In general, apparently, this characteristic is necessary. Server rooms, arranged in the former bathrooms, we have seen more than once. But here the situation was a little different. As it turned out, the server room was on the top floor. And the roof just over her and wandered. Therefore, as soon as the weather forecast promised rain, the servers prepared for water procedures. As it turned out, fixing the roof was technically difficult, so in the end, an awning was stretched over all the racks, and buckets were placed in the corners. Of course, temporarily. But as we know, there is nothing more permanent than temporary.

Did you install Exchange? -
Does it work? - Yes.
Exactly? ..

There was a task to ensure migration to a new domain and at the same time switch to a new mail server. The customer is understanding and understanding. He says, let’s let me install a mail server so that I don’t lose time. And you are already migrating. The master is the master. Come on. After some time, the customer reports, the new mail server is started, everything flies. Here we should clarify where it is launched and what flies, but we were somehow shy. We only clarified whether the first time everything flewestablished? This is important because an incorrect installation can cause problems with the server in the future. Having received a positive response, they calmed down. On the appointed day, our engineer arrives at the customer’s office to begin migration work. Looks at the new mail server, then in Active Directory, then again on the mail server. And he sees incomprehensible tails from unidentified mail servers (not those of animals, but also tails). Here follows a question for the customer, but the server was installed exactly the first time? The domain is new. Here it turned out that the mail server was installed two, well, a maximum of three times. Apparently, the post is not his element.

The switch can be connected

The customer asked to verify the connection of the new switch to the company’s network. It seems like the operation is not the most difficult, but since we were asked, we’ll do it. At the appointed time, our engineer remotely connected to the customer’s equipment. Then he reported that you can turn on the new switch. Which, in fact, the customer did. But then the unexpected happened. The engineer’s heart froze for a moment when he realized that he had lost access to the remote equipment. Attempts to connect to any other equipment at all were also unsuccessful. Is there a problem with the Internet? So after all, there are two providers everywhere: both ours and the customer. Has the poor 24-port switch laid the entire network? A call to a customer on a mobile phone does not pick up the phone. A call to the company itself, also no one picks up the phone. Slight panic. But then the customer calls back and informs that he connected everything and everything works. Our engineer decided to clarify what exactly works? It turned out everything: the network and Internet access. So why can't we connect. It turned out that our main provider was having problems, due to which access to some subnets on the Internet was partially lost. Among these subnets was our customer. Here is a coincidence.

About letters from customers
(note - syntax and spelling preserved)

From a discussion with a customer of work related to moving a company:

By the way. It seems they found a hut for moving. Near (20 min walk) from metro Avtozavodskaya.
The amount of work no one, acre az the sinful and my boss (in part), does not represent.

Customer response to Happy New Year:

Look plz, maybe that from the point of view of network security is worth improving. And then we have nothing to do in the holidays in NG (

Determining the criteria for choosing a product:

PS On Thawte the light did not converge. Moreover, they have a name - you will break your tongue!

Feel like a doctor:

I send a fluorogram of a payment for disks. Power of attorney can be issued?

Please send a recipe for happiness:

Can you tell me that you need to minimally press on the router in order to achieve happiness. Schaub pinged at least something.

Re-issued the invoice for payment for the 4th time, we send it to the customer with the question, how accurate is the information that tomorrow they will pay?

Answer: “Yesterday they still wanted to ... the director left urgently ... And today we have cut off the light for the whole day ... Tomorrow, if the meteorite does not fall on us, we will pay”

After putting up the proposal for consumables, we ask: “What do you say?”.

Answer: “I think we print a lot”

Sometimes customers share their feelings about not-so-successful experiments with setting up equipment:

I totally stuck, even went to a restaurant after work and got into a rum with grief.

Or they explain how they managed to complete the setup:

From despair you still do not get so heated.

About the everyday life of engineers

A visit to various events by an engineer is an ordinary matter. The main thing here is not to forget to register, once again clarify the location of the event, the date and time, and also not to forget the name of the colleague, for whom you decided to go. Surprisingly, from time to time problems arise with each of the voiced points.

SMS from a colleague:
- Seryoga, hello! Today I am going to the event with Borey for the whole day (approx. Event in Krylatsky).
I come to work and see Boris there:
- Borya, you forgot, you have a seminar today.
- No, he is tomorrow.
“Where did Lesha go with you today?”
“Now I find out ...”

At the registration desk for the seminar (two engineers registered for the seminar, but the other went instead of one of them):
- Please introduce yourself from which organization and what is your name?
- I'm from CBS, my last name is Ivanov.
- For some reason I can’t find you ...
A colleague standing nearby whispers in his ear: you’re not Ivanov, but Ivashov.

The specifics of our work involves not only remote configuration. It is often necessary to travel to the "fields", i.e. to the territory of the customer for the installation and configuration of equipment. To make the trip as efficient as possible, the engineer prepares for him almost as an astronaut for going out into outer space. The customer is specified in advance the maximum possible number of nuances: are there free sockets or UPS, where to connect, is there free space in the racks, etc. Before leaving, an engineer collects everything necessary on a checklist: a phone with charging and a headset, a laptop with charging, tools, console cables, adapters, etc.

But, as practice shows, to predict all unforeseen circumstances and difficulties that an engineer in the fields may encounter is very problematic. A good example. Arriving at the installation site of new network equipment, a trained experienced engineer discovers the following picture:


Then a rhetorical question sounds: “Guys, is there a ladder?” And thoughts are not aloud “Well, damn it, I just didn’t take it today ...”.
I think it will be superfluous to report that the stairs, of course, were not found anywhere. Therefore, the HIGH-level engineering idea and the HIGH-technological approach come into play:


As a result, the new equipment was successfully installed, tested and put into operation.

About applicants

When selecting employees, you have to read a fairly large number of resumes. Often there are interesting phrases in them.

A very important quality, which is sometimes lacking, the comrade noted in the resume for the position of engineer:

About me: Tolerance towards laymen in the field of IT.

The scale of the duties of an engineer inspires respect:

Position: Engineer (duties) Reception and processing of space information of the Earth

Knowledge of English is a big plus for the engineer, but communication with the dictionary ....

English: read, translate, speak with a dictionary

In the CV for the position of the system administrator, very necessary qualities were noted:

Key skills:
Ability to save small worlds.
The ability to communicate with people with an adequacy level of -1.

Well, what a PR manager and not:

Key skills - handsome

Good quality, but perhaps not quite for the IT world:

There are hands, let's get work done!)

You can’t argue with this remark, unless you are a pensioner (although there are exceptions):

All Achievements Ahead

For some reason, you believe that previous experience can help in the negotiations:

Candidate for the position of Negotiation Specialist. Formerly: Mass-entertainer, pyrotechnician

And here the previous experience is doubtful:

Candidate for the position of Business Analyst. Previously: Business Process Specialist. Main functions: Organization of various events (parties, corporate parties, birthday).

How the candidate sees his responsibilities

Candidate for the position Sales consultant: Skills: ... give advice, beautifully tidy up the hall ...

So to say, the game - find an extra word:

the speed of writing is average, rocky and responsive ectopic sheathing intelligent

And what were some funny cases at work?