For some reason MVP (minimally viable product) does not start
On a warm autumn morning in the center of Moscow, near the entrance to a gray skyscraper, a well-dressed man nervously walked around. He was wearing an impeccable suit, an expensive tie, and flawless red Italian shoes.
This was the CEO, and he was waiting for a delegation of auditors at the IT enterprise entrusted to him. Dressing, a short haircut of graying hair and a steel-giving look - successfully complemented the image.
The delegation was late, and the gender looked sternly at his companion. He was distinguished by an elusive look, gray, as if his appearance was blurred in the air, and responded to the appeal “Colonel”, and better - “Mr. Colonel”. For he was from where the colonels remain forever.
The colonel on the radio interviewed posts on a possible route.
Finally, he blinked: the Maybahs spotted two minutes from the office.
Gandir had something to show delegations.
As befits a theater - he started with a hanger. From the locker room.
Gray cabinets with floor height kept the outer clothing of developers, testers and system analysts ...
A stand with drawers for mobile phones and other staff electronics was separately arranged. Opposite the stand was a concentrated security guard with accounting books. He had a serious task: to provide staff with access to a mobile network no more than twice a day and no more than 5 minutes, or more often - upon presentation of a specially formulated requirement.
The delegation went on to a huge open space.
Flat tables extending into the distance, neat rows of monitors, a hundred people at clean tables, emitting only a tapping of the keyboard and mouse clicks.
It was a wonderful sight: a hundred workers in gray or blue suits, with neat haircuts, are focused on the screens. All monitors are turned to the aisle, panoramic windows cover the blinds - nothing distracts: neither the sunrise, nor the night.
The delegation was impressed: in this huge zad, where it seems everyone was breathing in and out in unison, a unique innovative IT solution was born right now in front of them ...
But suddenly! one place was empty: there was a table, but no one was sitting at it! Gendir chewed his lips and glanced at the Colonel - he briefly threw into the radio: "place 72, code 15".
The delegation passed a pen with a few female staff: a white top, a black bottom, natural makeup and low heels - everything was verified in this company. Gandir was pleased to feel such a clear satisfaction of distinguished guests.
The delegation walked past the offices with signs “Polygraph”, “First Division”, “Contact Control Bureau”.
- What is it? They became interested.
“The files are being collected: you never know who will meet in the evening, and what will be given to whom,” the gender responded, entering his office.
It immediately became clear that his master was used to keeping everything under control.
It resembled the place of a trader from the exchange or the flight control center: a huge monitor in half the wall showed pictures from all one hundred monitors of workers at once. Some of them are highlighted in pink - those who have slowed down the pace of writing code or something else important. The second huge monitor showed video from surveillance cameras.
On the neat five-meter desk of the director were full trays of papers: “daily reports”, “report notes” and something else.
In the center of the table lay a multi-colored printout of the A3 format: “Schedule of dismissals.”
Obviously, the owner has long and thoughtfully worked on this document.
The testers were satisfied, they were only confused by one thing: the MVP of a cardinal, innovative, new, systemic solution has not yet been obtained ....
“... a 60-hour work week, conversations with relatives, improving the KPI system ...” - the gender report on new initiatives.
At this time, on the monitor of the video surveillance cameras, it was seen how the guards took a man from the table, dragged him to the entrance and put him on the sidewalk, carefully adjusting his tie.
- What is it? Asked the pink-cheeked inspector.
- Do not worry! He has signed everything for a long time. And now ... well, maybe the heart ... We don’t need industrial accidents?
The visit came to a logical conclusion, gender - to the approval of the leadership.
That's just with MVP .... Well, somehow it did not work out .... Temporarily, probably.
PS. From the author.
Of course, this is a compilation of three companies.
Venue: Moscow (City, Skolkovo (!)) And Kaluga Region.
Action time: summer 2018 - spring 2019.
This was the CEO, and he was waiting for a delegation of auditors at the IT enterprise entrusted to him. Dressing, a short haircut of graying hair and a steel-giving look - successfully complemented the image.
The delegation was late, and the gender looked sternly at his companion. He was distinguished by an elusive look, gray, as if his appearance was blurred in the air, and responded to the appeal “Colonel”, and better - “Mr. Colonel”. For he was from where the colonels remain forever.
The colonel on the radio interviewed posts on a possible route.
Finally, he blinked: the Maybahs spotted two minutes from the office.
Gandir had something to show delegations.
As befits a theater - he started with a hanger. From the locker room.
Gray cabinets with floor height kept the outer clothing of developers, testers and system analysts ...
A stand with drawers for mobile phones and other staff electronics was separately arranged. Opposite the stand was a concentrated security guard with accounting books. He had a serious task: to provide staff with access to a mobile network no more than twice a day and no more than 5 minutes, or more often - upon presentation of a specially formulated requirement.
The delegation went on to a huge open space.
Flat tables extending into the distance, neat rows of monitors, a hundred people at clean tables, emitting only a tapping of the keyboard and mouse clicks.
It was a wonderful sight: a hundred workers in gray or blue suits, with neat haircuts, are focused on the screens. All monitors are turned to the aisle, panoramic windows cover the blinds - nothing distracts: neither the sunrise, nor the night.
The delegation was impressed: in this huge zad, where it seems everyone was breathing in and out in unison, a unique innovative IT solution was born right now in front of them ...
But suddenly! one place was empty: there was a table, but no one was sitting at it! Gendir chewed his lips and glanced at the Colonel - he briefly threw into the radio: "place 72, code 15".
The delegation passed a pen with a few female staff: a white top, a black bottom, natural makeup and low heels - everything was verified in this company. Gandir was pleased to feel such a clear satisfaction of distinguished guests.
The delegation walked past the offices with signs “Polygraph”, “First Division”, “Contact Control Bureau”.
- What is it? They became interested.
“The files are being collected: you never know who will meet in the evening, and what will be given to whom,” the gender responded, entering his office.
It immediately became clear that his master was used to keeping everything under control.
It resembled the place of a trader from the exchange or the flight control center: a huge monitor in half the wall showed pictures from all one hundred monitors of workers at once. Some of them are highlighted in pink - those who have slowed down the pace of writing code or something else important. The second huge monitor showed video from surveillance cameras.
On the neat five-meter desk of the director were full trays of papers: “daily reports”, “report notes” and something else.
In the center of the table lay a multi-colored printout of the A3 format: “Schedule of dismissals.”
Obviously, the owner has long and thoughtfully worked on this document.
The testers were satisfied, they were only confused by one thing: the MVP of a cardinal, innovative, new, systemic solution has not yet been obtained ....
“... a 60-hour work week, conversations with relatives, improving the KPI system ...” - the gender report on new initiatives.
At this time, on the monitor of the video surveillance cameras, it was seen how the guards took a man from the table, dragged him to the entrance and put him on the sidewalk, carefully adjusting his tie.
- What is it? Asked the pink-cheeked inspector.
- Do not worry! He has signed everything for a long time. And now ... well, maybe the heart ... We don’t need industrial accidents?
The visit came to a logical conclusion, gender - to the approval of the leadership.
That's just with MVP .... Well, somehow it did not work out .... Temporarily, probably.
PS. From the author.
Of course, this is a compilation of three companies.
Venue: Moscow (City, Skolkovo (!)) And Kaluga Region.
Action time: summer 2018 - spring 2019.