Me boat

Part 1. Until the

yellow corpus callosum could not be called caring. I don’t remember what they did to me, but the “Chinese snot”, frozen in the inside with a huge white spot, testified that these actions were hasty and inaccurate. My full name - Dabel U El Nine Handred Ilawan  - hardly settles in the memory of random acquaintances, which is why I am usually called Noname .

The road took more than a month. Ukraine turned out to be a country of fluorescent lamps, terrible carpets and strange people, on whom a razor cries. This is exactly the impression I got after unpacking. Two silly faces bent over me: male, overgrown, out of breath, and female, thin, elderly, with a barely noticeable antennae. The thick bristles moved, and a solemn voice announced:

- Mother, this is for you!

-  Smoked , what is it? - the antennae moved anxiously.

- Now, where is it ... It must be written ...

Sweaty, slightly trembling hands grabbed me and brought it to my unshaven face.

-  Double Ve El Nine One One! - announced the male voice, completely distorting my already faulty name.

“But I asked for a quadrocopter!” And in general, November ... Where will I swim with this thing? In the puddles? And that I dream to take a bird's-eye view of the city, I already inform you the second birthday in a row!

“Mother, it's not as bad as you think.” Despite the modest price of $ 38, this is a wonderful powerful model with a signal radius of up to 80 meters.

- This sucks Chinese Noname. A normal device will not be called Ve El Nine Hundred Eleven.

The clock wearily struck three times. I looked at the wall, focusing on the alleged source of sound, but instead of the clock I saw a calendar with the Virgin. I recalled a Chinese proverb: "sometimes God does not give you what you want, but not because you do not deserve it, but because you deserve more." Verily, this mustachioed woman did not yet understand that I am a much greater reward than a quadrocopter!

Kurilo continued to make excuses:

- Mother, let's not rush to conclusions. So, what do we have here ... Remote control, battery, charger, manual ... Four finger-type batteries are needed in the remote control. From under the remote control for cars fit ... That's right, rearranged ... Strange, for some reason does not start.


Together with FS Racing 53810.

- Smoked , look, there is a moisture sensor at the bottom.

- Exactly! Need to wet him with something!

- You can slaver. Let me slobber, and you press the gas.

Mother’s warm, wet tongue slid over me. I felt charged particles running in my stomach. A motor started, and his subtle humming filled the room. The antennae stretched out in a gentle smile:

- Oh, what a delight! Works! So what do we do now with him? He’s not in the bathroom to swim!

- And let's go to the river! - suggested Kurilo, clearly pleased with the unexpected change in maternal mood.

- And let's go!


On the forest beauty.

Part 2. During.

Behind the noise of my own motors, I heard nothing.



Part 3. After.

The old autumn sun hung helplessly over the river, unable to warm it. The battery started to run down, and my thin, frozen hands finally ripped me off the cold surface.

“By the way, mother, I’ve come up with poems for your birthday,” Kurilo spoke up, while my mother shook me terribly in the air, trying to get rid of the drops. - Here, listen.

Quietly rejoices mother,
Console clutching in a fist.
A boat is racing fast.
Along a sparkling river.

In the maternal heart is a holiday:
She has a Chinese friend.
He, the plastic prankster,
guarantees leisure!

“A good style, but no realism,” sighed her mother. - A friend from this boat, like a frog from a frog, a prosecutor, especially when a little water gets into him. He then sags and ...

- You can’t please anything! Okay, listen to the second verse!

Calm. Frogs are voting.
Joy megaton!
Let you over fifty,
But prone to toys.

Here you are standing by the river,
A buzzing is heard,
And the same
understanding of life is changing.

A hedgehog lurks behind a bush,
In the hollows are someone's faces.
Remote control wherever you turn -
A new course will be laid.

And suddenly pops up from the darkness,
Like a viscous quagmire, The
thought that we ourselves are
Someone's Chinese crap ...


In the rays of the sunset.

Kurilo finished his speech, but his mother did not start, and some strange alarm suddenly arose in this gap. The sounds of nature seemed to have piled on two inappropriate figures on the banks of the river. Frogs from the first verse frantically sang.

“Smoked, let's get home,” the mother sighed at last.

“Yeah,” was the answer.

Yeah, I thought.